Me Time Just For Me is an ever evolving project & journey that has come about because of my need to do something for myself & my want to educate and encourage discussions around Mental Health and taking care of ourselves.
Before I move forward into telling my story, I would like to warn you that some of what I have to tell, maybe a trigger for you.
Around this time 3 years ago, I was working on pulling myself out of a nervous breakdown. I guess I have always struggled with anxiety, I just didn’t realise what was going on.
When my son Charlie was about 18 months old, my then-husband & I were driving along the Western Ring Rd and I have no idea what the reason was, but I decided it was a good idea if I opened the car door & threw myself out of the car. Luckily my husband acted very quickly, put the central locking on & pulled over. I was hysterical & clearly desperately unhappy.
After this incident, I started seeing a psychiatrist and worked on getting my Reiki II. Not long after this, my marriage ended & I started on the next chapter of my life. Looking back now, I realise that I had a lot of lessons to learn and I needed this time on my own to grow.
During this time, I had a very high-pressure job in the music industry. We were touring Fleetwood Mac, KISS, Blondie, Chris Isaak, Joan Rivers, UB40, INXS, Andrea Bocelli and Pavarotti, just to name a few. The very first weekend I started working full time with this music promoter, I took 10 people from the Fleetwood Mac party to Grape Grazing in the Yarra Valley. That was one way to leap into a new position!
I am sure from the outside it all looked and seemed very glamourous, but two years in & I was totally burnt out, I had anxiety & depression but my desire to please and do a good job kept me going until I couldn’t. After a long-overdue pay rise was knocked back, I had enough & I left. I spent my last weekend in the “glamourous” job hanging out with INXS in Tasmania, a fitting way to go out!
I then went on to work in my girlfriends pop up fashion store, part-time, earning some cash to pay the rent. I literally had nothing left to give. During this period, my mum passed away and I split with my partner at the time. Being a single mum with a young son, I had no choice but to keep ongoing.
Fortunately, I had a contact at Nike Australia and landed a position as an Executive Assistant. I went on to become the EA to the Managing Director as well as 5 others. Skip ahead a few years, I’ve met my now-husband, I turn 40 & we decide to have a baby! What the??? Who even does that!
Being very aware of my mental health, I discussed continuing my intake of anti-depressants while I was pregnant & we decided that the benefits of my being on them far outweighed any side effects. I stayed on a very low dose and was closely monitored.
Once Summer was born, I very happily stayed home with her and then took a redundancy package from Nike. Almost immediately, I accepted an offer from my previous employer & fell back into the events industry & working long hours. I moved between his companies and to get to the point, I ended up running his business as he traveled a lot.
In Feb 2017, my daughter started school, had her 5th birthday and my Father passed away suddenly. It was also the busiest time of the year for the business. In the days that I was organising the funeral, work was being dropped at my house.
I couldn’t allow myself to stop. Everything came to a head. I had no time to grieve, I was working 16 hour days including the weekends. I had a nanny picking up Summer from school, I was literally seeing her for an hour at bedtime and then I would work until I went to bed.
In May, it all came to a head. My sister pulled me aside & said she could see that I was literally not breathing and this was no way to live. The people around me saw what I needed before I did. I went straight in and resigned from my job. I stopped working totally in the July. I woke up one morning and I couldn’t turn my neck and my arm was not functioning properly. My body had decided to let me know I had to stop. In discussions with my husband, we decided I would take the rest of the year off, to be present in my life, for me, for my daughter and for my family.
During this time, I worked on myself, saw a psychiatrist, a spiritual healer, and a naturopath trying to get my mind & body into a healthier place. I was literally broken. I would go to my regular yoga class, lie there and just cry, I could not get my body moving. My saviour was finding Yin Yoga at Alive Yoga & Pilates with Pam. This class is still now my favourite and my not negotiable.
Slowly, slowly I started to feel better, but it was a very long process. I was tired, very tired. I would have a nap every day and set an alarm to pick up my daughter. I hibernated, I couldn’t be around big crowds, even sometimes small groups of my friends. When it got the start of the next year and it was time to start working again, I really didn’t want to give up the freedom I had or the time that I was spending looking after my daughter & being present for my family. I felt I had worked long & hard for others and now was the time to do something for myself.
What was I good at? What could I do? I needed to do something that would also allow me to keep working on my mental health and continue looking after myself.
Me Time Just For Me grew out of my love of fashion and also my want to educate & encourage myself & others to look after their mental health.
My mental health is an ongoing part of my life. I continue every day to make a concerted effort to include something for me. This comes in many forms. I love my yin yoga, I do circuit training, I get my eyelashes done, I write in my journal every night, I attend networking events to have adult conversations, I still take naps on the weekend with my daughter, I say no to outings or events if I am not feeling up to it. I now know that I need to regroup after being around people, I need my own space to clear my head.
Last October, I was very proud to put together the launch of Me Time. Just For Me which was 6 months in the making.
I was fortunate enough to be able to bring Chelsea Pottenger to a small group of lovely Me Timers, where she presented her life changing workshop. For me, this was an absolute dream come true. I wanted Chelsea & I wanted to launch my passion and I am amazingly proud of myself for following through on my wish.
I feel like it is only the beginning of my Me Time Just For Me journey, and I am truly blessed to have you along for the ride.